Monday, March 31, 2008

You Know Adoption is For You If:

  • The fact that there are 143 million children without a parent to kiss them goodnight has made you lose sleep.
  • You realize DNA has nothing to do with love and family.
  • You can't watch Adoption Stories on TLC without sobbing.
  • The fact that, if 7% of Christians adopted 1 child there would be no orphans in the world, is convicting to you.
  • You spend free time surfing blogs about families who have experienced the blessing of adoption.
  • It drives you crazy when people ask you about adopted child's 'real' parents. (or when they refer to my bio children as my "real kids")
  • You have ever been 'pregnant' with your adoptive child longer than it takes an elephant to give birth. (2 years!)
  • You had no idea how you would afford to adopt but stepped out in faith anyway, knowing where God calls you He will provide.
  • You have ever taken an airplane ride half-way around the world with a child you just met.
  • You believe God's heart is for adoption.
  • You realize that welcoming a child into your heart and family is one of the most important legacies you could ever leave on this earth.
  • You know what the word 'Dossier' means, and you can actually pronounce it!
  • You have welcomed a social worker into the most private parts of your life. (It absolutely amazes me the things a social worker needs to know!)
  • You shudder when people say your child is so lucky that you adopted them, knowing full well you are the blessed one to have him or her in your life.

-Author unknown

It seems like lately, more and more people are actually asking about 'adoption'. Not just Jillian, but the act of adopting. I have always had a heart for adoption, and kind of wondered what it would be like once I had actually done it. I have to say, that it is 100% a miracle. I am just as awe inspired with when and how Jillian joined our family as I am the 3 children I gave birth to. I can almost equate the anxiety mixed with excitement, mixed with the unknown....either to what labor would be like the first time, or to that dreaded plane trip. I don't know if I'm saying that to where anybody would understand me....but it was just that so many of the same exact feelings were there. I know China adoption is so uncertain right now. The wait times are up to 3 years. I would really not encourage anyone right now to start your China adoption. However, I would encourage everyone I know....IF you feel like it's what the Lord called you to do....look into it. From the Ukraine, or Russia, or Ethiopia...or our foster care system. Granted, we tried that too, and for my particular state, and it was an absolute mess. (but we are from Louisiana.....that should say it all!!) Jillian can be a handful, (as my mother can attest to for her birthday lunch!)but all toddlers can be. I have to say though, that truly, there is no line whatsoever in between my biological children, and my adopted child. They are equal. All the questions I was asked about looking at them differently, etc....I can say resoundingly that there is just none of that. I laugh sometimes and say I love her as much as my biological children, and I can get as mad at her as I can with my biological children. And frankly, as a general rule, except for this blog, we don't ever even say...biological, adopted, etc. It has been a perfect blend....and I thank God daily for bringing her to us.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008


I'm wanting to sell my store. I miss the frazzled young mother days. It's overwhelming to have a child in middle school, a child that's almost 2, (and 2 more kids in between), run a house, run a store, and be a pastor's wife. I've been praying about it for so long now, and I just can't believe that the Lord meant for me to be running around like a crazy person with Jillian. As I'm typing this, I'm remembering that for the 2nd month in a row, I have forgotten to send in a required tax document on time. How could I forget that?? I'm just way too busy!!! And what's so strange is, that until last month, I haven't ever forgotten this. I think I'm mentally shut down when it comes down to running my business. I'm just not doing it justice. I'm praying that the Lord will send the right people along, pay us what we need to have, and I will be a stay at home mom again. I took the kids to a local play area today since the older ones are on spring break....and it brought back so many memories of the other children being young. The trips to McDonald's with a friend and her kids, storytime at the library, BSF, and trips to the park. I have NO time for any of that now. And I miss it desperately. Clearly, Jillian is my last child, and I feel like I'm shorting her the younger years that my other babies got to have. So, I'm trying to think of what possibilites I have open to me now. IF I can sell the store, what can I do to make extra money? I know the Lord will show me....I just need to go back to the mighty

Monday, March 24, 2008


Sleepless night....

I could not sleep last night. Actually, I could sleep in about 10 minute time slots. When I did go to sleep, I dreamed of China. Mostly not the 'real' China...but my own little dreamland China. Although, the airport in Nanning was in my dream....that's how I actually figured out I was in China. Dreams are crazy, aren't they? I do so wish it wasn't such a long flight(s), and it didn't cost so much!!! But then, as I was thinking about all that was in my dreams, I thought of Jillian's dreams again. What does she dream? Do her grumpy days have anything to do with it?? I know I'm probably thinking about all that too much, but I do wonder if she'll be able to share anything with us when she starts talking more. I know, that's really a crazy idea...but I do find myself wondering about the life she had without us. I imagine that's normal...but I haven't really thought about it as much as I am now. I have always really just accepted the fact that there is LOTS of information we don't know....and will never know. And unfortunately that's not going to change. So, it's just going to have to be a great Monday afternoon nap for me!! Maybe I'll dream about sleeping this time!! LOL!!

Wednesday, March 19, 2008


Since I haven't been doing alot of blogging lately, I've not been checking other blogs either. Last night, when I couldn't sleep, I went looking. I was shocked and thrilled to see that one of the families we had followed was already doing the paperwork for #3!!! They went to China in September to meet their baby #2. They have now sent their LOI to adopt an 11 year old boy!! I think they are amazing to even be thinking of this. I have told my hubby lately how fond of China I have been getting. I know this is totally backwards logic, but we didn't choose China because we loved China. We chose it because I felt in my spirit that is where my daughter was. While I was there, I didn't really think I would ever go back. In fact, as we were leaving each city, I thought, "bye Nanning" if I would never see it again. Granted, I'm not sure if I want to ever see Nanning again...not my favorite China town, but I do hope someday to be blessed enough financially to go back, and take my children. My 12 year old so desperately wants to go....and I'm believing that he will get to one day. Maybe we can all go together when Jillian gets old enough to see her 'homeland'. But for now...I just live through the pictures of everyone else's blogs. Remembering when we actually had our gotcha day....and got to go to the summer palace. Yes, I'm feeling rather fond of China...and I'm thrilled more and more people are going back again. So, congratulations Henderson's!!

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Under Construction....again.

Since I have SO much free time...I thought I would try to redo my blog. Of course, I loved the new design, but it just wouldn't let me do what I normally like to do. So I'm trying to get it back to somewhat close to what it used to be...with a few subtle changes. Bear with me as I work in about 10 minute time slots!! Welcome to the world of 4 kids!! LOL!!

Monday, March 17, 2008

Back again...

Well, we have been sort of crazy lately. Over the last month, we've had Chandler's birthday, I lost my grandmother, and we have made it through testing week. Spring break is just a week away, and I'm not sure if I'm ready for it, or not. On one hand, I'm looking forward to NOT having to get the kid's up and adam so early, but I'm NOT ready to have all 4 home with me all week. I'm praying that it will be pretty weather, and they can go outside at least some of the time.

When my grandmother passed away, we loaded up all 6 of us, plus my mom, and drove 12 hours to Georgia. It was definitely the longest trip we've taken since China. On the way there, Jillian did not do so great. On the way back though, she did fantastic. I couldn't believe the world of difference. I was thankful to say the least!!! It was great to see family that I hadn't seen in years. We have all vowed to stay in touch, and not wait until another funeral to catch up.

Jillian is still in a generally very demanding stage. She truly has such a precious personality....but she is spoiled. Now, last time I asked on my yahoo group about adopting a 'spoiled' child, I was griped at pretty good. So, don't be mad at me for saying that...after all, she is my daughter!! LOL!! I think I've mentioned before that I feel like it's a good sign...that she is so comfortable, she's comfortable enough even to have a fit. We would love to begin breaking her from her thumb sucking, but I think it's just a little too soon. I feel like she's been here forever, and I have to continually remind myself she's only been with us since November.

Thanks for checking map isn't working since I changed to my new page, but I know there are a few of you that still check in from time to time to see Jillian's progress. I wish I could blog more, there are just not enough hours in the day!!